Should’s and Should not’s

When we simply choose a goal and rush headlong into a list of should’s and
should not’s, and think that we are going to change our behaviors and values
based on the advice of others, most of us are destined for failure, or at best on
temporary attainment of the goal, only to revert to old habits and slip back into
smoking, overeating, not exercising, a lack of effective athletic techniques, and
frustrated by our failure to reach rewarding career and relationship goals.
We’ve neglected to take the critical first step.

Getting in touch we want we really want requires a “trip” outside of our linear,
rational process. We’ve been socialized and shapes by what others expect of us,
and consciously or not we tend to fulfill those outside expectations, again because
we’ve been trained to focus on what other people will think. It goes deeper, based
on early performance, feedback and ensuing confidence of lack of confidence.